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Voting Question: My husband and I have nothing in common?
I am a very thoughtful, sensitive, strong and loving person in my own way. But I am a spoiler. I don't work, I am a full time student with years of school ahead of me in my pursuit of a phD, but I handle our finances. I want my husband to have the world, whether he buys it for himself, I buy it with what little I receive, or we acquire it together. I am extremely attentive to his desires (to the point where video game releases, sneaker releases, and the start of sports seasons or movie releases is programmed into my phone). However the same treatment is not reciprocated. My husband couldn't plan a day for me if he tried (which he doesn't). I have taken him to professional NBA games, bought him his hearts desires in the form of his dream car and technology galore (not cheap), and I am happy to do so. And I don't believe I have anything that he has bought that is tangible and holds meaning or much value and he's the one with the job. My husband and the phrase "its the thought that counts"..are not too synonymous. I tried today to say something along the lines of "I wish you'd be more open to my likes and wishes" ie. ballet, art, culture, traveling. You know, expanding our horizons as a couple and being able to say we've done things, seen things, gone places before starting a family. He replies "Why would I partake in things I don't like". I tried to explain to him that I do for him, that I'm not always interested in his interests but because it makes him happy I participate and am happy to do so. He replies "Well thats you." He said "I'm not wasting money on things I don't enjoy, when you have your own money then I'll be happy to waste money with you. But as long as it's my money, then I'm not." I implored him to be reasonable, using future children as an example. Ex. your child is in band, you buy a trumpet. Why? It doesn't benefit you. He replied "it benefits me because they are furthering themselves and they are happy which in turn benefits me. I replied "Exactly! We are furthering ourselves in an area of my liking, and it would be nice if you benefited from seeing me happy which would make you happy." He continued to just get agitated saying I was trying to change him, not seeing my point that I make him happy at all costs. I just want the same in return. He just answers "Well if you don't like doing things that I like, stop doing them. That's you who does things you don't want to do, not me. We don't have to do everything together." I fail to understand as a military wife, who moves around frequently and to be honest is a "pleaser" in life and especially to him why I would experience life alone if I am with a life partner. We are young vibrant and should want more from life instead of the cookie cutter movies and fast food joints. I refuse to get my degree, pop out children (as he's expecting) and witness the thoughtful caring father, that should have been present as a thoughtful caring husband. Without rambling, I have dealt with nonexistent birthdays, holidays, anniversary's, traditional ways of doing things and so much more. But as we are getting older, as I am closer to my degree, closer to my career, I want to experience life before I really settle down with a family. I am not trying to change him (I would find it odd if he started spouting ballet recital dates and botanical garden locations). I just want "thoughtfulness" to come across. I want to know that he will try something new (nothing routine to enter our daily lives), but something fresh and exciting out of his comfort zone just for me and my enjoyment and because I am happy in my own element for once. Am I wrong to want more out of life? Am I wrong to want to experience life with my husband and have stories to tell our future children? Am I wrong to expect a fulfilled part of existence with my best friend before we open the next chapter?
I want to know if I'm communicating wrong or just plain wrong...
Thank You.
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Resolved Question: Report cards help!!!!!!?
My mom and dad are both super super strict towards grades. Anything below a 70 to them is considered horrible. Now are finals are worth 40-50% of the WHOLE year. Im soo scared cause i didnt do as well and im freakin scared to show my parents. Heres a little description of the marks (you dont have to read the second paragraph if you dont want to):
in history exam, their was an essay part of it which is wrth 40% of the exam. I didnt even know what to write cause i forgot about that particular event it was asking about. So im down to a maximum of 60%, but i know i didnt get 100% of the questions so im guessing i failed history exam with around 40-50%. Science i thought i did well, but my science teacher told me my mark of the exam and said i got a 52%. In french i also thought i did well, but my friend asked my french teacher and she said the class average of the exam was 55%. Everyone in my french class are smart and know perfect french so im scared if i am part of the class that failed it. And in math we had 2 exams; one with 45 questions and one with one enormous question. Each exam is worth 50% combining eachother with 100%. I think i did fairly well on the big question exam, but the other one there were so many questions i had no idea what to do! and in english i probably did pretty well.
Man im soo scared right now. For the past 5 days i couldnt get report cards off my mind. The thing is i studied and prepared a lot for these exams but i still didnt do quite well. I get my report card in 2 days. End of year report cards for me are thw worse because it is the thing that will either let me have a god summer or a horrible one. Horrible summer means my parents will constantly yell at me angerily that i didnt do well, take away my computer, video games, ipod, etc and not let me leave the house for fun stuff like going out with friends and stuff. Im soo scared what should i do?
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